Mariella Gattini

The past June was very hectic for everyone, for sure. The violent events in the world have been unbearable, I guess it is because the business of war is still rampant.

Looking for some normalcy I came across the film Carol, portrayed by Cate Blanchett, its screenplay based on the novel The Price of Salt by the writer Patricia Highsmith, a wonderful artist born in Forth Worth, Texas. She moved to, and later died in, Switzerland, because she was very critical of the U.S. foreign policy of her time.

Carol is basically her story, every character has a piece of her, from the grandmother to the granddaughter, and she is especially present in the two women lovers. She had to live her own sexuality, or, better said, her own duality, way before I was born. Throughout the story, I realized how hushed, harsh, and difficult her life had been. In spite of that, Patricia found the way to give a happy ending to these two women’s love story, which was her way to add strength to her own personal narrative, I presume.

Looking back, it’s easy to see how difficult things have been, and how far we have come as a society, thinking of all those people who had to fight to assert their identity in a very hostile social environment. Thinking that way makes us feel that all those violent events are in the past, and that the majority is advancing following the same path—accepting others for who they are, without recriminations, or bigotry.

And then, the Orlando massacre happened, which pushed us to doubt everything we have learned to appease our own understanding of human nature. Everything is okay until another deranged individual allows himself to get mangled in his own hatred, hatred for himself and, as a consequence, for the rest of the world.

What to do? In my view, we can’t do much if we are not sincere with ourselves first. I believe that we have to look deep inside and see if there is any vestiges of bigotry left in us by the education we have received, and how much of that is influencing our own behavior. We can not condemn others for their demeanor if we don’t have our own in check. Bigotry is instilled from generation to generation, and if we don’t pay attention to our own thoughts we are probably going to be part of the problem instead of the solution.

In human sexuality there are different sexual orientations, and they are all acceptable, because they are a natural way of being. No one should be excluded from the norm, not in the reasonable thinking world, at least. The ones who deny those facts, hiding behind their religion, politics, or upbringing, are not only ignorant, they also are bad intentioned. They are simply trying to justify their indefensible hatred.

Hatred engenders only more hatred, and, as a consequence, yields only destruction, but it has no place to breathe in an accepting society, it has to necessarily disappear. On the other hand, hating is a decision you make, therefore, it’s your own responsibility.

To help end the issue, I believe that more and more people should come out of the closet, and, in exchange, there should be an accepting community ready to support them, and to be there for them when tragedy strikes again. I wish I had an interesting personal story to tell in terms of my own sexual orientation. Unfortunately, I don’t. But, as a writer, I know something about coming out. I dare to be a writer, and what is worse, I dare to be a woman writer, one hundred percent committed to her craft. Being a woman still is a stigma in literature. Most women writers who dare tackle reality from a universal perspective are vilified, put in their place, or ignored. And yet, here we are. We are not going anywhere, and many more are coming out, I’m sure.

The writer Patricia Highsmith, Carol’s creator, and all those murdered in that club in Orlando did not live and die in vain, as long as we remember them with respect, not as victims, but as courageous souls.

Carol is a wonderful story of love between two strong women, who defied their time and their society. Orlando reminds us that is not a question of fighting evil, it’s a question of opening our minds to the diversity at large, and to all those opportunities that that decision brings because in a society of that nature, where constant mutual respect prevail, we all fit in and we all can benefit from each other’s diversity.